Moving on from the original version

I started this post way back in January and planned to publish it before it fell through the cracks. It references my first post, The Original Vision, so you should probably go back and read each section along with its companion here. I am posting this now, because I do need to say what I plan to change from the original vision. I want to write a few posts about the power structure in the city from a very high level so revisiting what I have already written about them is obviously important.


 
I want to read over my original draft again. I am going to take this section by section and go over what I like and what I dislike. You can find the original overview here and then read my comments on each section below.


I like the first paragraph. 'Nuff said, now onto the real sections:

Overview:

I think the opening is strong. Nine worlds however, says too much. For my new version, I am going to cut that down to two or three (not including self-contained worlds like the Day Palace). Nine worlds is just too chaotic for me, marrying the cultures of just a few worlds is going to be difficult enough, there is no need to go over-board.

Power Centers:

Whoops, I don't know what happened there. Obviously, that is terrible writing. Somewhere along the way, Count Vanus has turned into a Duke but I don't really care. In my palaces post I didn't name the duke. This is a problem of mine in general, I don't really do people well and it is a struggle to add a bit of life to my locations. The general idea here is good though, a powerless, insane ruler and scheming guilds. I have hinted at that already, with the Night Palace playing host to several Guildhalls. I will have to remember to add in some religious organisations as well.

History:
Some good and some bad here. Although I like the general plot, some details will need to change. The discovery of the extra portals will have to go. To replace the xenophobic invaders, I have some swamp kobolds from the second world lined up. I am going to ditch the mines. There are plenty of other reasons that the pits could be built.

People:

I would like to up the population a lot. I will have to do some research on the population density of Victorian Edinburgh and London. I love the idea of seafaring orcs ever since I read Louise Lawrence's Llandor Trilogy so I must find a way to keep them.

Economy:

I will get rid of the adamantine mines, but I need to come up with some more trade goods that would be traded between the two worlds. I can see a Dungeon Dozen style list coming on!

Military:


I am fairly happy with the military section, although it slightly contradicts an earlier section. The military power of the city has to be enough to fend off potential invaders, although not necessarily the invaders themselves.

Religion:

The Book of the Righteous was one of my favourite books of the early 3.0 D&D era and the home hearths of Anwyn was my favourite church. Not being religious myself, but a lover of history, religious architecture and art, I still like the idea of fantasy religions being a big part of every-day life. I think this is missing from many campaign settings, so including it here should be fun. The mad, frenzied priests and cultists of Greek mystery cults and sword and sorcery novels must also be included.

Magic in Nocte:

I now prefer a low magic, gritty approach to magic; but I still want mages in the city. I guess what I want to avoid is the magic as technology approach. Magic should be dangerous, risky and unpredictable. I have experimented with different mechanics in various roleplaying games to attempt to simulate this, mostly unsuccessful.

Underworld and Security:
Merging the Underworld and Security section with the Military section would probably be wise. They seem to be talking about the same group of organisations. I am sick of the concept of thieves' guilds, the concept seems mostly to cater to rogue/thieves who want to join an organisation. I hope I can come up with something a little more original that would motivate these characters to get involved. It also stretches my suspension of disbelief too much to have a 'city wide thieves guild'. Dinji is a hilarious name for a goblin though, so I will have to use him elsewhere.

The Pits:

Inspired by the caves and passages beneath Edinburg, the pits are one of my favourite things in the city. I can't wait to revisit this idea in a bit more detail. There is an abundance of information about Victorian slums, and I will draw heavily on these sources. I have no intention of pulling punches here and ideally, my audience should be a little disgusted by the inhumane conditions of the pits.

The Aqueduct:

I am pretty happy with the Aqueduct. Water sources are rife for intrigue and sabotage. Given the Aqueduct's importance to the city, I think a militia dedicated to protect it would be interesting, not to mention being used by one guild or another for their own political purpose.


The Guildhouse:

Should that be Guildhall? The headquarters of the guild of merchants and traders is obviously going to be an important building in the city. That said, it is not inspiring me at the moment and so I fear I will not return to this building any time soon.

Ten Thousand Tavern:

I am toying with the idea of creating a 3d model in order to map the city. A 2D map will never be able to capture the many layers and higgledy-piggledy nature of the place. A good practice run would be to map this place, I can image corridors leading through other random buildings to yet more rooms of the tavern. I will probably ditch the gladiatorial style battles. I think sublimating the violence of the city behind a veneer of civility will be more effective at highlighting its brutality. Having open battles in a pub takes something away from this approach.

Through the Portals:

Benoch is the name of one of my homebrews, have you noticed yet that I am terrible at naming things? Look out for a post on naming in the near future! I will probably ditch these worlds and start again. I mentioned swamp kobolds above, and seafaring orcs. I also need some human civilisations on each world to trade between. I also have the option of only using one prime world, with the portals sufficiently far apart to encourage trade.

 
Well, there it is, a little analysis of a ten year old bit of writing I did. Clearly it needs work, but that is a good thing given I have dedicated a blog to this.

The Dwarves of Csarnok

Far beyond the plains of Blonks and it's surrounds near the source of the river Skoll lies the mountainhomes of the Csarnok dwarves. Once a mighty empire that spanned the Hegek mountains that form the spine of the known world, they are now a dying race, fractured and defeated.

No war brought the Dwarves low, no famine nor pestilence, yet brought low they were. No baby has been born in the mountainhomes for a century and their halls echo emptily. The dwarves left their mines, crafthalls and smithies and fell into a maliase. Now they barely speak to each other, most of the time they can be found sitting staring at nothing. With no new produce, the dwarves barter away their heirlooms and prized possessions in exchange for the minimal food they need to survive. The dwarves don't even particularly seem interested in that survival, a fact that various monstrous races have used to their advantage. The dwarven Csarnok populations have halved in a century, no new babies have been born in that time. Old age and one-sided conflict have hastened the dwarves demise.

The dwarves of the city of darkness talk often of this maliase as they are seemingly unaffected. In fact, almost none of the dwarves who have left the mountainhomes are similarly afflicted. Some of these dwarves attempt "rescue missions" back to the mountainholmes but almost all are failures; the rescuers either falll into the depression of their intended rescuees and never leave the mountains, or return unsuccessful. One successful expedition was mounted recently however, led by Butusov Feargehar. He and 12 other dwarves ventured to Crajeholde and brought back almost 50 fellow dwarves. In their words, they felt "a great weight lifted from my shoulders, something in those halls is pushing the dwarves down and I for one, will never go back to the accursed mountainhomes."

The successful foray by Butusov Feargehar has inspired massive enthusiasm for the "plight" of the dwarves. Charities have sprung up founded by poor and wealthy dwarves alike. Posters adourn every wall advertising rallies for the dwarves as well as new charities and charitable organisations.

As yet unnoticed by the dwarves of the city, they too are affected by this curse, their productivity is slowing and the quality of the work they do is declining. They may survive another century, or another millenia; only time will tell.

The Guild of Spelunkers

The guild of spelunkers is a small group of researchers, daredevils and eccentrics that are interested in the void surrounding the rock. Although the guild has no real political or economic power, it does have some very wealthy individuals in its ranks. The guild has two offices in the city, a 'club' at the very top of the Anchor with a domed glass lounge. The other office is more practical in purpose, with a cable room allowing a platform to be lowered far below the rock. The current record for the farthest lowered person is over a mile by Aelfric Thaumage.

Notable members of the guild:

1. Aelfric Thaumage, elf - A young and impetuous elf brought up by humans. Considered something of a maverick amongst the other members, he claims to have glimpsed 'paradise' through a telescope on one of his spelunking expeditions. The night was incredibly clear of its usual smog and Thaumage tells graphic stories of a lit, verdant island with long necked, furry quadrupeds frolicking in a small stream. Of course, no one else has spotted this wonderland, but he remains convinced that he saw it.
2.  Estaar Froeid is an orcish ex-captain who lost her ship and most of her crew almost 20 years ago. Too proud to  accept help from her clan, she became a land trader until she could make enough money to return to the seas. Having made that money in the city however, she developed a new goal, to navigate the void surrounding the city.  Froeid constructed a new ship atop her tower in the city, one day it might take flight, if only she can figure out how. 
3. Darnegaast is an actual mage, a rare sight in the city, although he pretends otherwise. Most of the time he successfully passes himself off as a trader of rare books, but there are rumors he was seen flying high above the city. This feat has earned him a firm membership in the spelunkers, and despite his protestations, has even been talked into attending a meeting or two. 
4. Aelfard Tornissien proclaims his proud membership of the guild, but secretly works to thwart the others plans of leaving the rock. Aelfard knew of the portals for many years before the first halflings discovered it. He used it as a storehouse, but was forced to move everything to another rock , a few miles distant. Tornissien is able to sneak off to his storehouse without anyone noticing but he lives in fear of one of the other splunkers discovering his hideyhole so he keeps a close eye on them.
5. Grumma Daar is obsessed with the void, it concerns her every waking moment. Luckily, she inherited a vast fortune from her engineering guild parents and invested wisely. With no need to work to make a living, and the social obligations of her family handled by her little brother Laarn, she can spend all her time dreaming and planning her next delve into the void. Currently she is experimenting with rare, imported bamboo for its flexibility and strength.

Noble Curiosities

Some interesting people and situations regarding the nobility.

1. Wife who quarrels constantly with her husband's mistress. She plays pranks to humiliate them publicly including having them followed by dung throwing urchins and on one memorable occasion, arranging it so that all he clothes fell to pieces at a major ball.

2. Elven bastard daughter of the King, is exiled in the city, plans to escape and overthrow her 'evil' father.

3. The scheming landed nobles that own the counties surrounding the blonks portal are constantly competing for control of the major thoroughfare between the river and the portal. They build new roads through their territory, raid each others roads and pay seemingly numberless urchins to misdirect traders onto their lords road. 

When arriving at the landing point, 3 roads lead off in similar directions, all signposted the same. Travellers are approached by many urchins begging coin for directions. Any who refuse help should expect barricades, detours in the wrong direction, armed escorts onto the 'correct' road etc. Of course, once past the tolling booth for the appropriate county they will be able to continue unmolested. 

4. Unguent Crell has given a vast sum of money to a charitable organisation, only  to find out it was a front for a group of smugglers and money launderers. He has started campaigning against the group, even going so far as to pay people to disrupt their activities.

5. Batard de Jucee has ordered his personal guard to surround and escort his daughter Yeriel around at all times. They are becoming quite a nuisance around the city by blocking alleys. Yeriel is looking more and more depressed every day, but no one can get close enough to her to find out what's wrong.

6. Servants of Sterwyn Lanhaller keep turning up dead. Lord Lanhaller publicly offered a reward to find the culprit, only to find out that it is his lover Alonquin who is killing to cover up their affair.

7. The orcan seaclans are holding their vicennial moot in the city. Naked orcs (few orcs wear clothing on the seas, but all city orcs have taken up the custom of wearing clothing) are swarming all over the city. The nobility are scandalised.

8. A number of shopkeepers  have noticed strange new coins issuing from the servants of several unconnected noble houses. The coins bear an almost porcine portrait of a woman on one side, and what looks to be an octopus on the other. Once these coins are distributed evenly amongst the population of the city, they will activate and suck the light into them.

9. Several young scions of rival houses were recently caught meeting in secret and and plotting against their families. As a punishment, the four young women and two young men have been chained together for a month. Hilarity ensues whenever they are spotted around the city.

10. In order to show their piety and to stay connected to the people, many guildleaders and nobles attend the home hearths. They spend vast sums on the patronage of artists, sculptors and architects to improve the home hearths to glorify the goddess (and of course, themselves). Two families in particular strive to outdo each other, building larger and larger temples to glorify Anwyn.

Through the Portals

There are a small number of stable, and an indeterminate amount of unstable portals in the vicinity of the rock.

The original portal discovered by Thenim Baytree opens onto a seemingly endless plain of tuberous vegetables and lazy brown rivers. Strings of towns line the rivers leading to cities at the foot of a vast mountain chain that spans the continent.  Barges ply the sluggish rivers and quite a port has sprung up a day's wagon ride from the portal, transporting goods to the city. Shanty towns often spring up outside the portal but marshals of the duke regularly destroy these illegal settlements as they provide no tax income. Although deaths are rare, the marshals are ruthless in their destruction, burning the buildings to the ground. The region around the portal is known as Blonks, populated by small farming communities of Halflings

Far to the south of the Blonks portal, on a large island, lies the goblin portal. Buried underground, in close proximity to the large goblin city of Weinhold. The portal opens above a roaring torrent that forms one of the many underground rivers that power the goblins technology. This watercourse is also the source of the city's water. A stone aqueduct begins here, carrying water to the city and its inhabitants. Beyond the great cities and dams of the goblins, lies the human realm of Trinnidin, a stern folk in constant conflict with the goblins over their practices of damming the rivers the Trinnidin use to irrigate their lands.

Only three portals are in constant, public use on the rock, and the final one leads to the swamps of Kohlness. The Kobolds of Kohlness had a mixed reaction to contact through the portal as they had previously been isolated in the swamps. It didn't take long for many tribes to start trading fish and herbs to the newcomers. Nowadays trade has civilised many Kobold tribes and trade routes have been even been forged through the swamp to the elven nation of Faireshade.

  

There are other portals of course;

•  Odeosa Fhrambrey has a portal to a micro world where he attempts experiments in cross breeding sentient species.
•  The Siren’s portal is permenantly barred. Massive chains and bars prevent anyone from entering the portal. No amount of barriers can prevent the hauntingly beautful songs issuing from the portal, passers by have been known to stop and listen for hours.
• The serene portal is seen only as bright green and blue disc, about 300 meters off the edge of the rock. A few mages and spelunkers have succeeded in reaching the portal, but none will report what they found.
•  Occasionally small portals open on the rock, most seem to lead nowhere but rarely, other worlds can be glimpsed through the portals. It is rarer still that someone returns after entering such portals.

The Anchor

In several Nocte neighbourhoods, massive chains, with links the size of a horse, can be seen randomly piercing walls and spanning streets. These chains hold up parts of Nocte that jut out over the edge and have allowed people to build wider and higher than would otherwise be possible. Most of the chains originate from the Anchor, a great spire of rock jutting from the surface of Nocte. Although it is completely covered in structures, it is still a visible feature of the city as it is the highest point on the rock.

Almost all links from the Anchor are covered by buildings, but those that are exposed to the rain corrode. In the past, these links were painted to protect them from the elements, but the Guild of Engineers who originally constructed and maintained the links have become complacent. Although founded to construct and maintain the massive engineering works that make the city, the engineers grew wealthy and lazy.

The Guild of Engineers no longer contains engineers, only the rich decedents of the people who made the guild great. Many public works around the city are decaying, from the chains of the Anchor to the rock itself. For many years excavations into the rock have been banned by the guild, in fear of destroying the structural integrity of the rock, but again, the guild has become lax and people have once again, started burrowing into the rock to create more living space for its inhabitants.

Some random plot hooks involving the Anchor and its chains.

1.       A mysterious young man in bizarre leather overalls asks the party to travel to far Haridam, where he has found a source of a magical salve that can turn rust back into iron.

2.       In the quietest hour of the day, a gang of hooded kobolds is discovered hacking away at one of the links. If they are successful, entire blocks of the city could collapse.

3.       Posters go up around the city declaring that a new chain will be constructed, fostering a new era of growth in the city. A vast sum of money is needed and donations are sought. Of course, the originator has other plans for the money.

4.       A lone bureaucrat attempts to inspect the Anchor, the source of the chains, to determine what decay is occurring. Unfortunately a street gang has taken residence in the Anchor and are not responding well to people trying to barge in.

5.       Ignation DeFleury, a member of the Delver's Guild, has a harebrained scheme to build new chains dangling from the underside of the rock. If they can be attached, massive amounts of housing could be constructed for a tidy profit. Potential locations on the underside must be scouted, never mind the flocks of giant bats and other nasties inhabiting the underside. If only Ignation hadn't broken his leg at the last 'giant balloon croquet tournament with refreshments', he would obviously do it himself.

6.       A naked man is found, hanged by his own knee length hair fashioned into a noose, dangling from one of the links above a busy street. Painted on his body are the words 'The day will soon come when all of the sinners hang from the Anchor'. It is unclear why the sinners will dangle from the Anchor specifically, nor which religion's sinners will hang.